alive.mov

The Sound of Music Recut

I don't remember this movie this way!

Off To Buy A Couch! Vblog

Walt Disney World Gay Days 2007

Here is a little slide show from our most recent trip to Walt Disney World!

100 Things I've Learned from Watching Televison and Movies

1. The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there, and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty.
2. You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home,
3. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it is not necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.
4. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds. That will finish in a sex scene.
5. If staying in a haunted house, women must investigate any strange noises in their most diaphaous underwear, which is just what they happened to be carrying with them at the time the car broke down.
6. If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.
7. If someone says, "I'll be right back", they won't.
8. Computer monitors never display a cursor on screen but always say: "Enter Password Now".
9. It is not necessary to say hello or goodbye when beginning or ending phone conversations. And none of your friends have to knock when they come for a visit. In addition, every front door can be opened from the outside without having to use a key.
10. Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.
11. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.
12. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
13. If you decide to start dancing in the street everyone around you will automatically be able to mirror all the steps you come up with and hear the music in your head.
14. Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
15. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
16. Any bullet from a handgun has enough force to throw a full-grown man ten feet back.
17. Characters will always find a parking space right in front of the building they're going to even in a large metropolitan city where parking is basically impossible.
18. Characters at a bar or at a restaurant table will always get the attention of a server at the exact moment they need to order.
19. When a gift/present is given, the top is wrapped separately from the rest of the box and it lifts straight off so that there is never any ripping or fumbling with wrapping paper.
20. A chase scene on foot in a city always has a shot of one of the characters running into the street, nearly being hit by a car screeching to a halt at which point the driver flails his arm out the window and yells an expletive.
21. Anytime a character in an awful rush confronts another character curious about his predicament, the first one says, "There's no time to explain," and then explains anyway.
22. No matter how slow zombies walk they will always catch up.
23. The bad guy will always throw his gun at you to indicate he has run out of bullets.
24. A candle or table lamp can light a whole room and at night time, it's blue.
25. If the main guy is in love with the main girl, he will always get her in the end, even if she's married. If she is married, her husband will always say "oh well, if it makes you happy"... and he'll never go to beat the crap out of the other guy.
26. If you are in a film, it is easy for you to master the skill of controling any vehicle you need, weather it be landing a plane, for example.
27. Everybody when needing a computer can type supper fast and never need to hit the space bar!
28. Computers never freeze or crash, unlike in the real world.
29. The computers have super duper graphics programes which can zoom into blurs in fotos to make them super clear!
30. The best way to get laid is to put on some slow jazz music.
31. Everytime the "hero" is sneeking into the bad guy's room, checking secret files on the computer:
1a. The password is already typed in.
1b. The password is very simple.
2. There appears a very slow bar saying "copying", "deleting" or "printing" and it is finished just before the bad guy, the security guard or the mexican cleaner comes in.
3. In addition to your non-booting computer, they are also turned off in a flash.
4. All the characters, even the blonde bimbo's put in to lure us to the cinema, became all-knowing super-mega-nerds once behind a computer. They always know what to do and how to avoid things.
32. Good guys never panic, they stay cool at point black range, and bluff their way out with the "you could surely use me in your plan" crap.
33. Heavy guns, for example on helicopters, cause cosmetic damage to the hero's transport, but one bullet makes the chopper blow up.
34. Text appearing on a computer monitor appears letter by letter and making a sound as if it was produced by a typewriter.
35. You can find whatever you want on the net in a matter of seconds.
36. If in a battle scene a bad guy actually manages to shoot a good guy, the good guy's friend has the time to listen to his friend's dying speech. Once dead, the friend stands up and shoots the correct bad guy (amongst a whole host of bad guys). The bad guy has apparently been sitting around just waiting to be shot!!
37. No Australian movie is complete without one of this:
1. A Kangaroo.
2. A Boomerang.
3. Ayers Rock.
4. A Koala.
5. All of the above.
38. When someone uses a TV remote it makes a clicking sound that is impossible to replicate by existing remotes.
39. When gunfire erupts in public places and cops respond instantly to it, they're usally killed by the first shots.
40. When gunfire erupts in public, where there are no cops, they take forever to arrive, but they can still chase the gunmen.
41. Detectives can watch a drug deal (carried out furtively in a shop doorway) go down from a distance of five yards away by the simple expedient of sitting in a car with a newspaper raised to eye level.
42. Cats always make a noise. If someone is creeping into a house and is momentarily scared by a cat, it always has to meow before running off.
43. A woman being chased by a murderer will always fall over, either because she's running in stilettos or is ridiculously clumsy.
44. Serial killers never just die... they will remain still for ages so that the hero is fooled and walks right past them... at which point the killer grabs their ankle and then keeps fighting.
45. It is possible to drive safely for long periods with your head turned completely away from the road ahead, either in conversation or looking at a map.
46. People brush their teeth before eating breakfast but not afterwards, at which point they run out the door with a piece of toast in their mouth.
47. Aussie accents in American films always sound like a mix of Cockney, South African and New Zealander. And they say things like "Streuth!" and "Blimey!"
48. The bad guy's sexy girl will try to seduce the good guy, then when that fails will beat him up using martial arts. That while wearing skintight leather, lycra and stilettos.
49. Women can never find their car keys while being pursued by a killer. Once they do find them, it takes them ages to fumble the keys into the ignition, giving the killer enough time to reach the car and pound on the window.
50. Somehow cars take several turns of the key to start but only when someone is chasing you.
51. Every bad guy knows how to tie really complicated knots... which somehow the good guy manages to untie.
52. A person investigating strange noises in their house always finds that the lights don't work, then stumble around in the dark rather than getting a torch. At least one of the noises they hear will turn out to be made by a cat.
53. When a cat eats a fish, it leaves the skeleton perfectly reserved and intact.
54. Dogs always bark at ghosts.
55. Vicious guard dogs can be easily distracted with a piece of steak.
56. Mice can somehow fashion a perfectly semi-circular entrance to their dwelling.
57. A small goat is capable of propelling a fully grown man through the air by butting him in the ass with it's horns.
58. Many animals, when they consume alcohol, will take on human drunken characteristics, usually to the sound of a trombone being played.
59. Anytime a person is expecting a bad guy to jump out at them, often they'll sigh in relief when it's just the cat, or the wind, or a tree branch against the window. But as soon as they let their guard down and laugh at their "silliness", they're going to be attacked by the bad guy that really was there after all.
60. When someone puts a baby down to bed, that baby coos and smiles, and then just goes right off to sleep. It's amazing.
61. If someone jumps off a bridge into a river, lake, etcetera, the water will always be deep enough to keep them from getting hurt. But when a bad guy falls from a river, he/she's good as gone.
62. Police officers never wait for back-up.
63. The only time people do say hello on the telephone is when it turns to be the bad guy on the other end of line calling to torment them.
64. Bad things usually happen to women who are alone in the house on stormy nights.
65. If you are driving somewhere on any other route other than a city roadway, you will probably have that road all to yourself and will not pass or be passed by another vehicle.
66. In the movies everyone seems to have some odd "L shaped" sheets on their beds able to cover a woman up to her neck and her partner up to his waste.
67. Being around a bomb causes time to slow down.
68. Bad guys die instantly, good guys die slowly.
69. When the good guy is being attacked by a gang, they will run at him one at a time while the rest stay (in the case of ninjas, dance) around in a menacing manner, allowing him to kick all of their asses by the time the scene is over.
70. Most of police investigations will require at least one visit to a strip club.
71. You can jump from a tall building and land on mattresses, a pile of boxes, or a dumpster full of garbage and, though you might groan and be a little slow getting up, you will not sustain any serious injury.
72. It's very easy to fool the security guards at highly top secret government institutions.
73. It's very easy for a computer hacker to break a security code and find just the information he's looking for in less than a minute.
74. If you're a criminal mastermind, you cannot just shoot the hero in the back, you have to tie him up and wait for some diabolical machine to finish the hero off and you can't wait around to make sure it works, which allows the hero a chance to escape, which he always does because apparently no bad guy ever got his knot tying badge in the boy scouts.
75. When an ugly girl takes off her glasses, gets a haircut, and puts on nice clothes she is suddenly very hot.
76. No matter who you are calling, no matter what time you are making the call, the person you're calling will always answer the phone, usually after only one or two rings. Of course, this assumes you aren't running from a killer while trying to make a call on a cell phone, in which case there is a 100% chance that either the battery will be dead or you won't be able to get a signal.
77. Whenever you put on a seatbelt, you will get into an accident.
78. The good guy always has the cooler cell phone.
79. If you chase someone through a park you will never step in dog poop or chewing gum, but you will always step on someone's picnic.
78. No matter how crowded the bar is, there are always extra stools available right in front of a bartender who is just standing there waiting for someone to order.
80. People who oversleep and get woken up by phone calls go straight to work without making the bed, but when they get home at night, their bed is made.
81. People in movies rarely have to shave, and whenever a guy does shave, he will be interrupted while half finished, and will wipe the remaining shaving cream off with a towel. Of course, even the part he didn't get to shave will be perfectly smooth.
82. When a good guy enters a house, he/she will avoid every shot of machine gun fire while killing a lot of bad guys. He/she doesn't need to reload his pistol until he runs out of ammo, which coincidentially happens when the main bad guy appears, at which point he fights him/her hand to hand.
83. In battle, a normal peon soldier is shot with one bullet and instantly drops dead to the ground, while the protagonist in said battle can be shot in various places by multiple shooters, and survive with a few bandages and a cast.
84. It doesn't matter who you call, if they choose not to answer their phone you will get their voicemail in less than 1.5 rings.
85. A devious villain will immediately shoot a non-important character whenever needed without hesitation. However when he finally has the chance to kill the hero seeking to craft his doom, he will undoubtedly hold a firearm trained on said protagonist for at least 90 seconds while performing a well-written soliliquoy. This delay is all the hero needs to escape.
86. When a woman is being pursued by a scary serial killer that she knows is in her house, she will always run upstairs instead of out of the house.
87. You can break into any house or door with a credit card.
88. The bad guy will always tell the good guy every detail about his masterplan instead of just shooting him.
89. Whenever a guy and a girl hop into a bed together in three seconds the girl will start moaning and will be close to climaxing. Plus the guy will always put a minimal effort, after all she will still be screaming and moaning away.
90. When someone has stopped breathing and has no pulse, simply breathing into her mouth twice and looking extremely distressed while screaming "DON'T YOU DIE ON ME!" will bring her back to life immediately.
91. In a TV episode where someone will probaly die, there's always an extra character that no one has ever seen before to kill him.
92. Aliens will always have more advanced techonology than us.
93. When you turn on the tv, the news will always be on.
94. People never obey warnings.
95. There's always a corrupt police officer.
96. Movie theatres and drive-ins only show classic horror movies.
98. If you meet a member of the opposite sex, and you both hate each other... don't worry... you'll eventually fall in love with each other.
99. Major disasters always happen in New York.
100. The President is always very considerate and well-spoken. Not to mention he always is able to fly a jet fighter when needed.



Kudos: tv.com, elpaquilloloco

Toast and Cat Theory

Salt and Battery

Kudos: The Warehouse

Lawmakers Vote No In Massachusetts To Putting Marriage Amendment On Ballot!

Thank You! Thank you to all the lawmakers who did the right thing and not let my civil rights be put to a popular vote!

Happy! Happy! Joy! Joy!

Big Day For Gay Marriage

Today is a big day for gay marriage. Today.. people who I don't know, will decide whether more people who I don't know, will decide if people as myself deserve the same rights that they so richly enjoy. What a country!

Bay Windows is live blogging the Massachusetts Constitutional Convention. I want to watch live but have to study!

Study, Study

Barbara Walters Ruins The View

 

I have come to the conclusion that Barbara Walters should be removed from her own show, ABC's The View! She seems to run from any controversy and comes across as if she wants everyone to be at a nice tea party. It is such a different show since Rosie O'Donnell has left. I say replace Barbara and let the girls go wild!

WTF?

The Soprano's final episode in one word... boring! This has to have been one of the longest drawn out series in the history of television...and for what? Where is the justice for all those who have been whacked these past 7 years? Does Tony go to prison? Is he eventually killed? The episode left me terribly dissatisfied, not to mention it was very slow paced. The preview made it seem like it was going to be very dramatic. Not! Well at least Sunday evenings are mine now. So Long Sopranos, and good riddance!

An 85!

Well I am a little better today. I finished my Anatomy and Physiology test and received a grade of 85. That makes me feel a little better. A and P is a breeze compared to Chemistry. My brain does not think logically and that is why I think I am having so much trouble. It is all math, and I just can't seem to keep the formulas straight in my head... not to mention they are all word problems. I feel as if my brain just shuts off when I see one.

A 48!

I can't believe it! My brain was about to explode from studying. I took my Chemistry test and got a 48! A 48! I haven't gotten a score that low since grade school. Luckily I still have an 85 average. This chemistry is my enemy. I hope that the rest of the chapters aren't this tough or I will be repeating this horrible experience. Never let anyone tell you that taking courses online is easier. It is hell!

Gay Days

We are alive! We went to Walt Disney World for Gay Days and our anniversary and had a wonderful time. We made some great friends.. Brad, Jim, Eric, and Jim! It was great to get away from the studying for a bit! Now I am back at work at it.

Chemistry and Anatomy

I haven't written because I have been swamped with Chemistry and Anatomy & Physiology studies!  I have decided to go to Quincy College for my Nursing degree.  I need these two courses to be admitted to their Nursing program. I am taking them online through a Seward Community College in Kansas!  There is so much work and there is an exam every 5 days. To say I am overwhelmed would be an understatement! I used to be an "A" student, but given the amount of material I am covering, that goal seems completely out of reach! I think I am going to have a problem getting the "C" I need for admission! Why I decided to take two courses at once is beyond me. A&P is accelerated and will take 7 weeks, while Chemistry is about 13 weeks. Well, I am off to the home Chemistry Lab... where can I buy Lye in solid form?

Doug Obey Loses!

Yes, Mr. Authoritarian may have had more votes in my neck of the woods, but thankfully he was rightfully trounced in Dedham, Massachusetts to Paul McMurty, the winner of the Massachusetts 11th District State Representative seat. The virus of "Obey" signs can now retreat from the planet...restoring our oxygen!

Vote for Doug Obey...Not!

I am so sick of politicians bombarding my phone line, mailbox, and life. I get so many calls telling me to vote for this one... vote for that one. Candidate for State Representative Doug Obey is hands down the worst! He is everywhere! Signs on lawns, phone calls, and way too many fliers. My biggest problem with him is his name....Obey! I'm not voting for anyone that has a name with that much authoritarianism! Yes he says it sounds like oh-bee, but Obey, is oh-bay... no matter what you tell yourself.
Today, Mr. Obey really kicked it up a notch by appearing at my front door! Now this man was actually invading my personal space! I decided I must confront him and find out what he is about, or at least to try and stop his virus-like campaign. I knew I must proceed cautiously, lest my house might somehow be plastered with Obey signs... shutting out all my oxygen. I opened the door.

Mr. Authoritarian shook my hand and introduced himself, little did he know what he was in for. Being the gay activist that I have become, my first question was, "What do you think about gay marriage?" Mr. O. looked at me and said, "I think the people should vote on it." Bzzzzzzzz, wrong answer. I told him how I felt that there is no way a majority should be allowed to vote on a minority's civil rights. I told him that there is no way the gay community can compete with the money that is being poured into writing discrimination in constitutions across the country from the religious right. He told me we had the most money and power. I told him he was wrong. He told me I should have equal rights, but that it shouldn't be called marriage, because it offends a lot of religious people. I told him we have separation of church and state. He told me he was against civil unions too, but says there should be something else that grants the same rights as marriage to gays and lesbians. I told him about separate but equal laws, and he had no idea there were such a thing. He told me that if it were put to a vote to grant the same rights to gays and lesbians it would pass. I told him he was wrong and naive. He told me that I was not legally married because the courts decided whether I could be married. I told him I was legally married in Massachusetts. He told me that if I was legally married then the people who wrote the constitution meant for gays to be married. I told him that was ridiculous, and that the constitution has changed since it was written, and will continue to change. He told me that marriage has not changed for thousands of years and was always one man, one woman. I told him that in some cultures it is one man and many women, that women were property, and that marriage has changed many times over thousands of years. He asked me what if men in the United States wanted to have more than one wife? I told him that is not the issue, they still can marry at least one person whom they love, while gays and lesbians cannot except in Massachusetts. He told me that discrimination doesn't go on here in Massachusetts, I told him it most surely does. I told him that if one straight man stands up against the discrimination against gays and lesbians, he has far more power for change than 10 gay activists. He told me he has to represent his constituents, I told him that should include his minority ones also.

There was so much that I wanted to say and yet I felt so unprepared for the debate. I only like to state facts when I debate and it was clear to me Doug Obey was sorely misinformed, yet felt free to state things he knew nothing about. He really needs to learn about discrimination, the power of mob rule, and he needs attend a good course on the constitution, the founding fathers, and constitutional law. He is extremely out of touch with the needs of minorities and doesn't even know that if the constitutional amendment passes... those of us that are married will still remain so. I wish that I could have studied some things before our meeting. The facts don't support most of his arguments, but I didn't always have the answers at my fingertips while he felt free to make blatantly false statements. I was so furious when he left and wanted to chase him down with other points. But my greatest fear is that this man will probably win. Our town is pretty conservative and will probably vote for him because he is fiscally conservative. And then there are those phone calls, signs, and fliers.

Nursing School? Which One?

Well I learned today that I have been accepted to Laboure College for Nursing. I just don't know if I should go there or not. According to admissions at the college I can start my actual nursing courses in September of 2008. In the meantime I have to take 6 general education courses before then. I can go part-time evenings for the general eds. When the nursing courses begin, I can take those of Friday nights and Saturday days. The program will take two years from September of 2008! My other option is Quincy College. I can apply in October of 2007 for January 2009! In the meantime I can take the 5 general education classes that I need there all online at another college and transfer them in. This program will take 2 1/2 years from January of 2009, thus adding an additional ten months. The nursing courses for Quincy will occur 3 times a week at 2:30 in the afternoon for the first year, and then twice a week at 2:30. Quincy will also be almost 9000.00 cheaper than Laboure. I really am having a terrible time trying to decide. At 43, getting out 10 months early seems really inviting. The money I will start making at the earlier date will more than cover the 9000.00 difference. Knowing that the Nursing clinicals are Friday nights and Saturdays, seems to be easier to manage while I am at home taking care of my mom too. The downside to Laboure are some of the general eds that I have to take that I have no interest in such as World Literature, Religions of the World, or Christianity. The fact that I physically have to attend the college while taking the general eds takes me away from my responsibilities as caregiver to my mother as well.

Quincy is very appealing in that they will accept so many of my general eds from my days at Framingham State, and the only gen eds that I have to take are science courses that I can take online. I can be around at home whenever mom needs me until the Nursing classes start. The downside are the afternoon clinicals, which is when my mother may have doctor appointments and such. The other downside is graduating 10 months later than Laboure. Considering that I will probably want to pursue a Bachelor's or Master's while working, 10 months is a nice chunk of my quickly advancing age!

I think if Quincy got me out at the same time, I would probably go there. Taking online science courses with home labs is very appealing to me. I could also probably hire someone if need be with the 9000 dollars I would be saving to sit with my mother. 10 extra months at Quincy though seems like a lot added on when I am just trying to get an associates degree. I need to decide by Monday, so I am having a great weekend!

Rock Music

I have never been a fan of rock music. Tonight on American Idol they featured music from the band, Bon Jovi. I really don't know why I never caught on to the rock craze. Growing up there certainly were enough bands that I should have liked. I found myself drawn to the sounds of The Captain and Tennille, The Carpenters, and Olivia Newton-John. My brother used to listen to The Beatles when I was young. I remember spinning like a record player in front of his full length mirror to the sounds of, "Listen, Do You Want To Know A Secret!"  I think I have always preferred a vocal solo to a guitar solo.  I also think  I have always been "melody crazy." If it's catchy... I'm all over it! I am still singing "You Had A Bad Day" from last season's American Idol!